Poem In Which My Womb Is A Whale

I have tricked my body
*****with small sedate pills
**********like chalk in the sea.

Now it campaigns,
*****heavy weight, duvet
**********breathing dry conditional air,
***************growing wide and white

***************my body is a wall I climb.

*****Dancing stops.

*****I  sleep a lot ––

*****more and more indifferent

**********losing the edge of light.

***************What did that taste like?


Hoping spring is eternal
*******my body breaks out of hospital*****look at the sky and turn blue!         ***********************************************look at the sea and turn gold!
***********************************************look at the sea and turn wet!
***********************************************look at the night and turn dark!
***********************************************look at the moon and turn bright!
***********************************************look at the fruit and turn to wine!
***********************************************look at you and turn into you –

**********if I should swallow a seed or small bird
**********in the pith of this root
*************************which is too much ––

the doctor fires a harpoon
***************kindly in my guts.

**********My womb is a small angry whale !
**********it clenches and cries –

***************I force a wounded truce
***************with the toy army man in me,
***************sharp spike, my fake plastic baby.


Rebecca Varley–Winter


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